Saturday, Nov 24, 2012

1. THE AFFAIRE: WASHINGTONS TOP SPIN DOCTORS ARE CONFERRING.

The relationship between four-star General David Petraeus and Paula Broadwell, his nubile young biographer, has moved into the crisis- management phase, according to Scott Shane in Wednesday's New York Times. Paula did not seem to be an appropriate perk for the Director of the CIA. However, if the real purpose was to free Petraeus to promote his biography, the tawdry affair could be spun as a clever tactic. Including a few details on the affaire could make the biography a best-seller. Meanwhile, other general officers are said to be ordering their staff to "shred" all, uh, "personal" e-mails, but Washington computer-security experts tell WN that you can't shred e-mail. Once it enters "the cloud," e-mail, like diamonds, are forever. (Aside: Voice recognition is a wonderful tool, but no matter how I enunciate "Petraeus," the Dragon insists on transcribing it as "betray us." I read nothing into this.)

2. THE GIFTS: ROMNEY SAYS HE HAS FIGURED OUT HOW OBAMA WON.

It was diabolically simple: Obama promised expensive "gifts" to the 47% that don't matter. Stuff like free contraception and coverage or forgiveness of student loans that an enlightened society should have been providing all along to help them some day matter. These are the people Romney wrote off at the infamous superrich fund-raiser (WN 3 Nov 12). Yet compared to the humongous tax breaks already given to the ultra rich, Obamas gifts are embarrassingly cheap. In fact, they offer a big return on the investment. In its 2012 report, released just a week ago, the UN Population Fund concluded that effective family planning initiatives could save $5.7 billion worldwide. What conservatives can't bear is the thought that people would enjoy sex. In the recent election both Romney and Ryan opposed federal funding of groups such as Planned Parenthood.

3. THE SECESSION: NOTHING IS CERTAIN BUT DEATH AND TEXAS.

Texas is threatening to secede over the election returns. It wouldn't be the first time Texas has seceded. France, Spain, Mexico, the Republic of Texas, and the Confederate States of America all claimed Texas until they discovered the place came with Texans.

4.THE CLASS WAR: PLEASE! DON'T THROW ME IN THE BRIAR PATCH.

When WN wrote about the $50,000-a-plate fundraiser for Mitt Romney, there were many complaints from readers who felt I should stick to science issues and vowed to cancel their subscription to WN. Naturally, I was badly shaken. However, as I explained to my Science and Public Policy class, I am not paid a dime for writing WN anyway.

Bob Park can be reached via email at whatsnew@bobpark.org
THE UNIVERSITY OF MARYLAND
Opinions are the author's and are not necessarily shared by the University, but they should be.